Exactly how many times can you ‘fall off the wagon’ before it counts as cheating…?

Things that I’ve learned this week…

1. This last 2 months of my clothing ban is not going to be easier than the first 4.  (This is probably my own fault for jinxing it at the start of the week, by uttering the ridiculous words ‘well, I’ve lasted 4 months, the next 2 shouldn’t be that hard.’  What a fool.)

2. No matter how many hours you spend smiling at a rabbit, it will NEVER smile back.  (This little gem was brought to me, and your good selves, by The Madster – a very, very funny 3 year old, who apparently has a very grumpy rabbit.)

3.  I still have very little willpower.

4.  Bonnie Tyler is from Swansea.

 Ok, so only the first and third points are really relevant to this week’s post, but it’s nice when we share…

One day rather early in the week, I was looking through the fashion pages of several gossip magazines with the girls from work (a thrice daily occurence), which is when the ridiculous statement regarding the next 2 months being easy left my lips.  Guess what happened that very night?  I found a pair of shoes.  Kurt Geiger shoes.  They were so pretty that I actually had to bite the knuckle on my index finger.  I know, it’s a surprising turn of events – just like when a character in a soap utters the words ‘well, it can’t get any worse’, and promptly loses their job/wife/sanity.  Or when, just as it seems the heroine will escape from the evil serial killer in a horror film, it turns out that the aforementioned serial killer is still alive.  And hiding somewhere totally (un)expected.

Last week, you may remember that I told you about a website called BigWardrobe.  It was here that the shoes were displayed, almost parading up and down in front of me to illustrate their loveliness.  So, I did what’s worked so well for me in the last couple of weeks, and emailed the seller to see if she wanted to swap.

On a side note, I promised to tell you about the swaps that I was waiting for last week.   Here’s the list;

Dress with floral top and black pencil skirt bottom – is actually a tulip bottom skirt.  I LOVE it.  Even more so as it’s a size smaller than I usually take (thank you MyFitnessPal – I no longer hate you for making me go to bed hungry).

Black dress with red sash – gorgeous, but definitely a size smaller than the label suggests.  So, I have 2 choices – put it to the back of my wardrobe and swear that I’ll diet even more to get into it, or re-list it.  Guess which one I chose? 

Black dress with ruffles – actually from Lipsy, which is great.  Has no zips or other methods of doing up, meaning that it slides on and off.  In theory.  Except that it wouldn’t go over my chest, so I forced it.  And then spent 40 minute (and a very, VERY panicked phone call to my Lovely Mum) before I got it off.  It was great.

Heart print shoes – very cute.

Pink shoes – very cute.  And small.  So, as it’s rather unlikely that I can slim into a pair of shoes, these will be re-listed.  Unless anyone knows someone with smaller feet than me.  A seven year old niece perhaps?  (My feet are a 3 or a 4.)

I’m now waiting for;

A red dress

A bird print dress

A Kate Moss for Topshop dress (score!)

A blue party dress

A grey/pink/black dress

I may have too many dresses once these have all arrived…Ah well, if need be, I can always adapt them into something useful.  Like pillow cases.  Or outfits for my dogs.  Or outfits for my cats (which I’m sure that they will then adapt into decorations for their catflap.  On an unrelated note, I found something else to spend my money on, and Jiminy – my conscience in the shape of a work colleague, for those of you who’ve forgotten – can’t even complain, because it’s something practical and useful – please click hereish to see their new catflap!)

So, that was a tangeant within a tangeant.  Aplogies for that – back to this week’s topic, and the Kurt Geiger shoes.  Where had I gotten to?  Had I emailed?…Yes, yes I had.  So, I received a quick and lovely reply, letting me know that the seller was really looking for a cash offer, but would accept £20 including postage.  For a pair of shoes that cost £120, and were still in the box.  STILL IN THE BOX!  But, as you know, I’m on a clothing ban.  But £20!  So, I went and asked my Lovely Mum for some advice.  And when I say advice, what I really mean is that I wanted her to tell me that it was totally acceptable to buy them.  Which she almost did.  I explained my dilemma, and the conversation then went something like this;

‘Well darling, they are lovely, but you do have lots of lovely shoes.  Would you wear them?’

‘Of course I would, they’re so pretty, and they’re worth so much…’

‘If you want them, then that’s ok, I won’t tell anyone.  And you’ve done so well for the last 4 months.  I mean, there have been a few things that you’ve really wanted and you’ve not broken your resolution.  It would be a shame to break it as you’re getting close to finishing, but if you really want them, I understand.  I’m just so proud of you for lasting this long.’

See – Supernanny for grown ups.  She knew that by telling me how proud she was of me, and for praising me for doing so well, there was no way that I was going to buy the bloody shoes.  She also knew that reminding me that I have lots of lovely shoes that don’t get worn enough, I’d feel guilty about even thinking of buying more.  Especially when they have ankle straps, which make my legs look short, so would probably just sit in the crate under my bed.  So, Lovely Mum – thank you for keeping me on the straight and narrow, whilst acting like you were just making conversation.  You conversational wizard.

I have also taken to browsing several well known online stores, that were key to my shopping addiction in the first place.  I can’t quite explain why I’ve taken to doing this – is it because I can then share with all my friends how many nice things are around at the moment?  Is it because I like to research fashion and enjoy keeping up to date on the latest trends, even if there’s not a hope that I can recreate them with what I already have in my wardrobe?  (70s flares and chiffon blouses, I’m talking about you.)  Or is it because it’s getting towards the end of the ban now, and I’m starting to wonder if anyone would really notice if I just bought one new dress?  I think that it may be all three.  But mostly the last reason.  With this in mind;

 Boohoo, New Look, Paul’s Boutique and River Island – if you’re reading, please can you take your sites down, just until the 17th June?  I’d be incredibly grateful.

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